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Tuesday, April 03, 2007
I watched a show tonight about a couple and their four month old son who
were lost for 9 days in a snowy wilderness without food. They
interviewed the man and wife, but left you guessing as to whether the
child survived or not until the end of the show. On occasion the couple
talked about their more fearful moments, like when they would suddenly
realise the baby hadn’t made a noise for quite a while, or when they
would wake up and fearfully check if the baby had survived the night or
not. As the suspense built towards the end of the show I was left
feeling physically uncomfortable. The thought of being in such a
situation – knowing your child would likely die and that there was
little you could do about it, was just horrifying.
There are such strong emotions wrapped up in being a parent – which seem
to keep growing stronger and stronger. While you delight in your child,
and love them unconditionally, you still find yourself having to gnash
your teeth on occasion. What you never stop having is the incredibly
strong urge to protect them.
The child survived by the way - with dehydration and a horrendous case
of nappy rash. The parents lost all of their toes.
Posted by Doug at 9:50 PM
Saturday, April 07, 2007
Jack had a reasonably good day – something that has been a little rare
of late. (The amount of discomfort children go through as they
physically grow staggers me.) With this happier state, we had a couple
little moments to remind us how pleasurable it is being a parent.
Al and I were blowing a feather across the dining room table between us,
with Jack trying to grab it as it went past. After watching us for a
while Jack took the feather and tried to blow it along himself – being
quickly successful. He was delighted. He then asked for us to blow some
bubbles for him – then subsequently tried doing it himself with some
success. (Be it on every 6th or 7th go!) It is nice how something so
simple can be such a great new experience for a child (and parent).
We did a big grocery shop today. Jack has been particularly taken with
sitting in the trolley seat, so much so that these trips are not yet a
drama for us. At the checkout Jack started repeating “help daddy”, over
and over, while passing items from the trolley to me. He does the same
when putting clothes in the washing machine, passing me wet clothes to
put on the line, weeding in the garden, or when holding the hose. I am
enjoying this while I can. Although it generally slows down whatever I
am trying to do, I know that in the not too distant future helping Daddy
will be one of the least important items in Jack’s to do list.
Posted by Doug at 10:19 PM
Sunday, April 08, 2007
Easter and Chocolate = Maniacal edge
Posted by Doug at 7:33 PM
The Easter bunny arrived this morning. Mindful of Jack’s dairy allergy
it brought along some milk free eggs. They are rather rich, but Jack
still seemed to enjoy then in small doses. Tonight Jack did one of the
most horrendous smelling nappies he has ever done – and I mean utterly
disgusting, fill the whole house, noxiously gagging.
The remaining eggs have strangely disappeared.
Posted by Doug at 11:26 PM
Monday, April 09, 2007
On Tuesday last week while picking up Jack from Childcare I noticed that
he had slept for two and a half hours. I asked them how they manage to
get him down to sleep for so long. “Jack? Oh he’s our little angel. We
just lay him down and he quietly puts himself to sleep. At most we
sometimes might have to just quietly pat him.”
Mumble, grumble, mumble…
Noticing that they always put Jack down to sleep at 12, Al has been
trying to incorporate that time into his normal daily naps at home. It
seems to have helped.
Posted by Doug at 10:50 AM
Tuesday, April 10, 2007
It has been awhile between posts for me after a
busy few weeks. I had a week off while my sister was in town. We managed
to squeeze in 3 events at the world swimming championships (diving,
swimming and water polo) lunch with my brother, and some shopping (on
the days that Jack was at childcare). We also saw the show Miss Saigon
(which was excellent) while Doug minded Jack one day. Jack and Doug also
came along for a trip down to my sister's house in Geelong on another
day. Jack enjoyed the new toys he got from Auntie Lis. My sister and I
also took him on the 'walk/run for the kids' (around the Botanical
Gardens). Jack managed to excitedly walk and run the first kilometer
before going into the pram for the rest of the trip. It was an
enjoyable, albeit very busy break. I felt like I was going back to work
to recover from my holiday!
I then had a morning tea with the mother's group,
followed by a trip down to Geelong to see my high school friends.
Unfortunately Jack was overtired and out of sorts on this trip, which
left him on edge with the other kids for both visits. He enjoyed an
early dinner with his grandparents afterwards. He loves pa doing 'incy
wincy spider' for him (generally involving pa putting clothes on his
head and making clothes dance). On Easter Thursday Doug and I went to a
little afternoon tea at Jacks childcare centre to see the Easter hats
the kids had made. When we arrived Jack was looking very cute wearing
his bunny ears. Finally we had another catch up with Damon, Dominic and
Isabella on Good Friday. Again Jack was a bit out of sorts with the
other kids at the start of the visit, but thankfully relaxed and enjoyed
playing with the cars, trains and other 'boys toys'.
I was relieved after all this to enjoy a quiet,
relaxing Easter break. Jack was also in need of the quiet time, and for
the most part was relaxed and happy at home, with one park visit and a
couple small shopping trips thrown in. We bought him some little blue
chairs to sit at our downstairs coffee table which he was very happy
with. He chose the colour blue (we gave him a choice). We hope to
continue to give him choices where possible. It was nice to see Jack get
excited by his non-dairy Easter eggs (even if the resultant nappy meant
he won't be getting any more), and he has asked to put on his bunny ears
quite a few times since. We also appreciated the egg painting Jack did
at his other childcare.
Summary of Jack at 21 months:
. I stopped keeping track of the individual Words
Jack knows after he hit 200. He certainly continues to impress with his
ever increasing vocabulary, and puts words together more and more often
in phrases or short sentences.
. When Doug picked him up out of cot one day he
said 'find mummy now'. He also told me today as we were leaving for
childcare 'see Ellie soon' (when I had told him a couple hours earlier
he would see his friend Ellie today). So he seems to be starting to
understand 'now' and 'soon'. Doug is teaching him to say 'hooray home'
each time he arrives home with him. When I bring him home by myself in
the car or when we are out for walks, he says 'home daddy' - to indicate
he knows we are going home to daddy. He is also starting to use more
smaller words in sentences, such as 'the' (eg 'up the stairs', 'through
the gate'), and 'on' ('ladder on top' - of firetrucks and the like).
Jack also says 'bless you' to us when we sneeze, which is very cute.
. When Jack is eating or drinking, or even with
some of his playing, he likes to say 'bit more' to indicate he wants
some more. When he is finished he will often say 'all done'. He will
also say 'all done' when we have finished doing something like changing
his nappy or washing his hands.
. Jack has a few cute word mix-ups at times, even
though he generally gets things right. For example he sometimes mixes
'up' and 'down', 'shut the door' and 'open the door'. Sometimes he will
repeat 'hello Jack' or 'bye bye Jack' back to us, whereas other times he
will say 'hello daddy', 'bye bye mummy'.
. A new toy for the month was a turtle puzzle with
the alphabet on it. He can find 'm' for mummy, 'd' for daddy, 'J' for
Jack, 'g' for grandma', 'p' for pa/pop, and 'z' for zebra amongst other
letters. He also asks me to do the big floor puzzle with him (that his
grandparents gave to him a little while back). He loves the new toys
from Auntie Lis, which included animal fridge magnets, a world globe
with flying plane, a dragon tail (which makes a noise – now that he has
got over his initial fright from it), and some new books. He has also
enjoyed looking at the new train book his grandparents gave him. He
especially loves the new matchbox cars we bought for him - 'silver
racing car', 'red car/mummy's car', and 'black car/daddy's car'.
. Jack is now able to climb up onto our dining
chairs, and enjoys sitting at one with me sitting on another, tapping on
the table. His reach is also increasing so he can grab more things off
our kitchen table and benches, meaning we need to be more alert.
. Jack has just learnt to blow a feather across
the table, and blow bubbles with a little bubble maker. He was very
excited by these little achievements, and we enjoyed sharing his
enthusiasm. He also likes to pretend to blow up my Swiss ball by working
a little air pump up and down on top of it.
. Jack is getting more into imaginary play. He
likes pretending to drink 'cups of tea' from toy cups, and makes big
slurpy noises (as I have done when I drink the imaginary teas). In his
bath last night he was moving the dinosaurs along the edge of the bath
and making them say hello to each other, give each other kisses in
greeting, and getting them to drink pretend water and cups of tea. He
also had them doing 'peekaboo' to each other, and moving other bath toys
along to interact with them.
. Jack still refuses to wear shoes. His Auntie Lis
managed to find some great slip on dog and alligator shoes, that he is
intrigued with. He allows us to put them on and off his feet, and did do
one walk in them for his dad for about 10 steps (but has since refused
to stand up in them). We really will have to start forcing the issue
soon with the winter weather approaching; otherwise it will really limit
his opportunities for being outside.
. Jack's sleep patterns are getting more
consistent. After learning that his Monday / Tuesday childcare puts him
down at 12, I have started doing the same. He has gone down quickly and
easily, so I will try to do that as regularly as possible. He also
seems to understand 'bath then bed' at night, and goes down calmly each
night. Most of the time he drops off to sleep quickly, although
sometimes takes a bit of tossing and turning and the occasional chatting
before he goes to sleep. He still goes to sleep on me for each sleep,
and then transfers into the cot for awhile, before then coming back onto
me for the rest of the night. From that point he generally sleeps
through the night, just occasionally waking up or asking for his dummy.
Posted by Al at 11:57 PM
Wednesday, April 11, 2007
Recently Jack has (on occasion) asked to go to bed. Tonight as Al when
to start the normal bath and bed regime Jack stopped her at the top of
the stairs, pointed at our bedroom, and said “Bed, Bed, Bed, Sleep”. Al
asked if he wanted to have a bath first, but he said “No, Bed, Bed”.
Posted by Doug at 8:58 PM
Sunday, April 15, 2007
We visited Jack’s Grandma C and Pop this weekend. The trip takes around
two and a half hours, so requires some careful timing and a bit of luck
to get up and back without Jack getting antsy in the car. A crying and
inconsolable child in the back seat can make for an extremely difficult
distraction – something we have experienced a number of times now.
Thankfully Jack slept through most of the trip up and again on the way
back – with us going up during his Midday sleep on Friday, and coming
back after dark on Saturday. It was a particularly good visit, and Jack
still seems to be thinking over some of it. This afternoon he was
telling me about Buck the Dog at Grandma’s house.
Posted by Doug at 6:24 PM
Friday, April 20, 2007
This week we decided to send Jack's alligator and
dog shoes along to childcare with him, to see if they could make any
progress. Lo and behold, when Doug picked him up they said he had been
happily walking around in them. When Doug got home with him, Jack
happily walked around in them again. He has continued doing so for
around 20 minutes each day since. Of course they then informed us that
the kids aren't allowed to wear slip-on shoes at the centre, so we will
now have to go hunting for some more shoes. We can only hope that now we
have made this breakthrough, he will be more willing for us to put other
types of shoes onto his feet.
This was the first week back to normal activities
after the school holiday break. At swimming Jack clung to me tightly for
most of the class and didn't want to participate very much, but didn't
cry at all. At playgroup Jack is still wary of the other kids if they
come into his personal space. I was therefore most surprised when Kiara
came up to Jack and asked for a kiss, and put her lips up ready, that
Jack gave her a kiss! They then repeated this a couple more times. So
Jack has had his first kiss at the tender age of 21 months! It was very
cute. As usual, Jack loved his music class, and even sang along to
'twinkle twinkle' little star which was sweet to see.
Jack was a bit confused by the new location for
Gymbaroo today, and wasn't sure where he was. He kept saying 'Music?
Gymbaroo?' to me while we were waiting for the previous class to finish.
He excitedly said 'hello Lachie' though when he spotted his friend from
playgroup arriving. (It was Lachie's first time at Gymbaroo). I have
opted to try a different timeslot this term, so will see how it goes. It
seems to be a much smaller group, which I think will be better for Jack.
Of course, it is a little sad to not be in the same group as some of the
mothers and kids that we have befriended, although we still had a chance
for a quick chat with them since they are in the class before.
After a few months of consistently having 1 sleep
a day, Jack seems to have changed back to needing/wanting 2 sleeps a day
this week. He has still been getting up very early (between 5am and
6:30am) since daylight savings started, so by around 8am he has been
looking to go back to bed. He has slept for anywhere between 20 minutes
and 2 hours - and had to be woken up at times to be taken to childcare
or classes. He has then still gone down for his normal day sleep, and
is going to bed around 6:30-7pm. He has been mostly happy, but a little
out of sorts this week, and appears to have a slight cold so that may
also be contributing to his need for extra sleep at the moment.
Posted by Al at 2:48 PM
I think we managed half a week of normal Jack, before the angst of
teething returned full on. His eyeteeth are now coming through, and he
seems particularly unbalanced. I know the books, friends and
acquaintances can have a tendency to roll their eyes at teething
comments. It is viewed as an overused excuse for everything. If we
were not witnessing it first hand, I don’t think we’d believe the
process could be so long and have such an impact.
There was a mass shooting at a US University over the week. Thirty two
people were murdered, most young adults in the prime of their lives.
Even before the horror and grief was fully realised the media was full
of questions on why it happened, how it happened, and how it was allowed
to have happened. Experts lined up to explain it all - amongst the
calls for recriminations, justice, and new laws to protect the
community. Those with political agendas are already driving the dead as
vehicles for change.
In amongst it all are the families, parents and friends who have lost
loved ones in one of the hardest ways possible.
So how do Al and I protect Jack from something like this? Through the
hype and hysteria, a daytime TV show host spoke some words of wisdom
that struck a chord with me. He said that if we wanted to help protect
our children, then we must teach them how they can protect themselves.
Instead of wrapping them up in cotton wool, we should help them to be
self ware, confident and alert. Of equal importance, and reinforced
though this tragic event, we should encourage them to enjoy every day of
their existence.
Even as much as teething, over tiredness and a runny nose will allow.
Posted by Doug at 6:04 PM
Saturday, April 21, 2007
This morning we went out shopping. Al was tired and grumpy, I was tired
and grumpy, and Jack was tired and grumpy. You’d think that after being
parents for 21 months we’d have been smarter than to do that.
During the very short visit to the shopping centre we did manage to buy
Jack some slippers. His Aunty Melissa gave him some slip on clogs at
Easter that had animal faces on them. Jack was quite intrigued with
them, and actually started to wear them for 5 to 10 minutes at a time.
It was a significant breakthrough! They are a little prone to falling
off however, so the slippers are the next step towards Jack wearing
proper shoes. These are lighter, more comfortable, and are fastened up
with Velcro. Jack actually asked for them to be put on after getting
home, and wore them for over 20 minutes straight.
Al and I breathed a sigh of relief.
Posted by Doug at 10:19 PM
Friday, April 27, 2007
Jack enjoyed a visit from his Uncle Mal and Auntie
Sarah last weekend. He really seems to enjoy interacting with adults
these days, particularly grandparents, aunts and uncles who are paying
him their full attention.
We also purchased some new slippers for Jack last
weekend. He was happy to wear them for about 20 minutes when we got
home. I sent them along to childcare with him, and they reported he wore
them for most of the day! So this is a very big step forward for him. He
has continued to wear them for periods at home, but then asks for them
to be taken off when he no longer wants them. He finds is hard to ride
his outdoor bike with them on, so this caused a tantrum, but he happily
went for his first walk down the street in them. So it is mainly good
progress on the shoe front this week.
Unfortunately a not-so-good development has
occurred this week. He has taken to try to intentionally bite me at
times. When he was a lot younger we allowed him to bite our nose
(pre-teeth days) but now of course him attempting to bite our nose or
arms is very painful, and is obviously a behaviour we won't tolerate and
are trying to nip in the bud quickly. He has been teething yet again
this week, so perhaps he is looking to bite to give some relief to his
sore mouth. He has also had a bit of a chesty cough this week so has
been a bit out of sorts in general.
When Doug picked Jack up from his Tuesday
childcare place this week, his main carer there Rebecca was excited to
report a first. She had wet Jack's hair and combed it after his sleep.
She then held him up to the mirror and asked who he could see in the
mirror. He pointed at himself and said 'Jack' then pointed at her and
said 'Becca'. It was the first time he has called her by name, so a
special moment for her. He then called her Becca a couple more times
during the day, but of course refused to demonstrate it to Doug when he
picked Jack up.
Whenever I pick Jack up from his Thursday
childcare, his carers comment on how much he talks. We feel a little
embarrassed at times to know what to say when people remark on it. This
week his primary carer cautiously asked me if he interacted with other
kids outside of childcare. I told her that he sees kids nearly every day
at his various activities. She asked if I was aware of how he gets upset
by other kids coming close to him. Given he wasn't feeling well this
week, he must have had a particularly upset day. She commented that the
young twins in the room love to sit beside Jack and watch him play, but
he gets really upset by them wanting to be near him. She also said that
in the morning he was getting upset by another little girl (Bella) but
that he was then happy to play with her in the afternoon.
I asked how she dealt with it and she said she
just tells him that he is ok, and that they just want to play, and won't
give him a hug (as the other kids would perceive this as favoritism).
This is a change from the previous main Carer's strategy of moving him
away - separating him (which is then how I have approached things, to
try to move him away or distract him). So I am going to have to make
more concerted efforts with talking through his behaviour with him each
time he gets upset by other kids. Doug came along to watch Jack at
Gymbaroo today and noticed that some of the other mothers steered their
kids away from Jack. While it is nice that they are considerate (since
they know he gets upset), it also feels awkward to know people avoid
him! It has certainly been one of the most challenging aspects of
parenthood with Jack thus far.
Posted by Al at 2:46 PM
Sunday, April 29, 2007
Jack has been seesawing the last few days – he seems to be a different
boy every time he wakes up. Sometimes he will be happy, other times he
is constantly throwing Tantrums. Jackal and Hide.
At the moment my favourite Jack sayings are “BessYou”, “One More Time”,
and “Where’sItGone? ThereItIs!”
Posted by Doug at 10:02 PM
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